Onyeka Onwenu: How she was struck by the Cupid’s arrow for the first time at 13… the impact on her life

Published

2 years ago

August 3, 2024

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Love is defined as a strong affection for another arising out of kinship or personal ties. For legendary singer, Onyeka Onwenu, who died last Tuesday moments after an amazing musical performance at the 80th birthday party of Stella Okoli, founder of Emzor Pharmaceutical Manufacturing Company, love was something she first experienced at an early age: 13, an ‘age of innocence’.

In her memoir, Onyeka Onwenu revealed how she fell in love her brother’s friend, ‘Prince Charming’, at 13 years old.

My love life

On her love life, Onyeka recounted:: “I fell in love for the first time at the age of 13 in 1965 and two years before the outbreak of the Nigerian civil war. Looking back, I realize that I was indeed too young to know what love was. What does a 13-year-old know about love, anyway?

“I am not sure, however, that in my case love was something conceptualized as much as it was intensively felt. I was struck by a bolt of lightning from out of the blues. My heart skipped a beat each time the object of my attraction entered my space and I wanted to be in his presence for as long as possible.

“The attraction was not physical at this point. It was a meeting of two souls that effortlessly understood each other.

Strong connection I felt from day one
“This strong connection was felt from day one, as I saw myself in his eyes, and he thought that I was beautiful. The sound of his voice was like something I had heard before, there was a sense of familiarity in it. The attraction between us was so powerful that I said to God, not long after meeting Prince Charming that I had met the man I was meant to marry. If the person in question was not the one, then God Himself , should just forget it, because I would not marry another. It was an ultimatum.

“I was so sure of what I felt that my heart’s conviction came out in such a steely, matter-of-fact way, and with so much determination, firmness and finality. It was almost frightening that a girl of 13 would know her mind and express it so fearlessly. What a pugnacious little girl I must have been. I had no idea of the meaning of the words I was uttering, they just came tumbling out from the very depth of my soul.

“I did learn a huge lesson afterwards; be careful what you say, what you ask for and what you wish for because you may just get it.

Age of innocence

“ At 13, I was in my second year of secondary school. It was a time when, if you fancied a guy , you stayed far away from him. You were too shy to even admit that he was your love interest. If you saw him on one side of the road, you quickly moved to the other. There would be no contact, only an inner excitement that you had just sighted him. It was the age of innocence.

“My prince was a friend of my brother’s and the whole family knew and liked him. They were probably aware of my attraction to him. Later events would bear me out.

“During the school holidays, our house was filled with a lot of people, friends, schoolmates and acquaintances.

“ If you had friends , even of the opposite sex, you brought them home and they became friends with the whole family. There was no ‘corner-corner’ love as we say in pidgin English. Everything was out in the open and devoid of physical contact, of course.

“My prince Charming really fit the bill. He was tall, dark and handsome young man. A versatile, artistic, Shakespeare-quoting kindred spirit who lit up the room for me. There was something very special about him, an uncommon civility that made him interesting to engage. I am not sure that he was fully aware of my feelings for him.

“I do know that he was fascinated and was always attentive. He was interested in whatever I had to say and never talked down at me. I was treated with a great deal of respect almost as an equal. For this young man was the romantic focus of a girl’s active imagination, one made vivid by fairy-tale and romantic novels of the cheapo kind, like the ones exchanged among friends, worn out , frayed and slightly torn, from use.

“In those gushing stories, the Princess always got her Prince Charming in the end and they lived happily ever after.

“Could this love story, intense as it felt and hardly understood, be the product of the imagination of a 13-year-old with a creative mind? What were the chances that this strapping, good-looking man , fancied by more beautiful and sophisticated women would fall for little , old me, in a city like Port-Harcourt, where he had by far better choices? But he did and hopelessly so.

“By the close of 1966, when the echoes of war were heard in Biafra, the love of my young life had left Nigeria for further studies in Europe. I was trying to survive the war with the rest of my family. My brother , Richard and sister Zoe, were also outside the country. My love and I lost contact and I had no idea whether I would ever see him again.

I remained in love with him
“I remained in love with him all this period. In fact , throughout the Nigeria/Biafra conflict, I was known as Miss “No Man’s land.-the area or piece of land between two sides of a conflict . It belonged to no one. There were a few token and peripheral friendship, for sure but they were all just that. I wanted to be by myself mostly, alone with my fantasies and dreams. I thought constantly about the man who had captured my heart.

“In 1971, after the war had ended and just months before I was to leave for school in the United States, I ran into Prince Charming on the streets of Lagos. It was quite simply by serendipity.

“From then on and in full view of my family, we began a friendship. I was 19 years old. He was 26. We talked for hours, went out for meals and danced at a family gathering. My love worried in a letter later on , that my mum may not not have approved of the obvious relationship.

“At 19, I had matured into a sensible young woman who could take care of herself . I had my mother’s trust. In the period of our re-connection, my love had fallen hopelessly in love with me. For the next three years, and with the knowledge and acceptance of my family, we began a truly romantic relationship , one which we both expected would end in marriage. Yet my darling was sensitive and respectful. It was not a physical relationship.

“I was still a little green behind the ears, having just survived a brutal war and still trying to catch up with the world that had moved ahead of me by four years. Yet my love considered me beautiful and extraordinary. He would write a few weeks after I arrived in the United States from Nigeria.

“ My love and I were from a time when writing was how you communicated with people. There were no mobile phones , no email and no internet. With him in Europe and me in the United States, we wrote regularly even as we spoke occasionally on the phone.

“Those letters, I now realize, were instrumental in helping me survive my first two years in a foreign country. Having a friend and a mentor, who understood me, who, in fact, saw the potential in me before others did, was the deciding factor in my ability to thrive intellectually and emotionally. His love and attention gave me confidence in myself and my abilities…

Why I didn’t marry the love of my life
You must be wondering by now, why I didn’t marry my Prince Charming who had fallen head over heels in love with me. I wonder too. Looking back at the time we drifted apart in 1973, I realize that our timing was off. We were both not ready to marry and settle down; I was a sophomore at Wesley, with a whole life of learning ahead of me. The intensity of the emotions was overwhelming sometimes. We were still oceans apart and the long-distance romance was tasking.

“We had no time together, my love and I to talk. Later on, he had plans to come over to study and live in the United States, but they did not plan out. We lost touch and we both moved on . On my part, I did so, with much sadness.

How we found each other again
“My love and I found each other again in 1980, just as I prepared to return to Nigeria for good. It was a momentous reunion, an indescribably exquisite time together. We explored my city, New York . Walking on the streets of Manhattan and talking about everything under the sun. We listened to free classical music with the New York Philharmonic Orchestra, together with thousands of others in Central Park. Alone for the first time in eight years, we had a wonderful time rebuilding an almost-forgotten friendship. Again, my darling was a sounding board for my idea about coming home.

“Again, my Prince Charming had found his way back into my life, at a time of great change and transition. Moving back, to Nigeria, a rather traumatic venture was made easier by his friendship, support and counsel. He was even at the airport to welcome me back, together with my whole family.

“My acclimatization to Nigeria was complete, my friend and I went our separate ways again.

The intensity of our feelings being just friends is difficult. We lost contact for 27 years until we bumped into each other at a local airport in Nigeria in 2009 and yet again, it was by serendipity. He had moved back to Europe and was just visiting home. It was a difficult meeting this time. We were like two ships passing each other in the night.

The impact he made on my life
“Looking back, I understand why. I was going through a lot of emotional upheavals in my on-again, off—again marriage. The worst thing I could have done , would have been to add another emotional dimension to the muddle. I fled. After this uneventful chance meeting, I was sure that I could now put this friendship in a box and store it away from view, forever.

Perhaps, I thought I succeeded in doing that until serendipity threw up another meeting , one which reconnected us, once again, at a time of great transition in life. After the airport sighting in 2009, this meeting had taken 10 years . But then, we had known each other for 35 years. I have tried in all this time to define the relationship I had with this special person in my life., and the continued strong connection we feel, as if we were meant to help each other along life’s way.

“The timing of this most recent meeting has provided me with the opportunity to write about someone who had played a major role in my life, even when he was not physically around me. The story of my life would be incomplete without this sometimes sad but always inspiring love story.

“My friend and I may be in contact or we may not. But no matter how many oceans are between us, I remain grateful for this friendship and all that it taught me.”

“To the love of my life, I owe a huge debt of gratitude.Thank you for your kindness, for trusting in me with care, respect and appreciation. Thank you for believing in me. It gave me confidence. You saw my potential, even before I did and you convinced me that I was made for great things. Learned so much from you , even when you were not around, your compassion was palpable. Even now, I feel your encouragement. I hope I have not disappointed you. Thank you for being my brother and mentor, my friend for not being afraid to love me for myself, even as a pugnacious 13-year-old. Your friendship has enriched my life and I am glad that I finally have the opportunity to say, “Thank You.”

Metro News

NDLEA seizes N3.4bn Loud, Opium, arrests fake police officer, mechanic

Published

2 hours ago

September 20, 2026

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Operatives of the National Drug Law Enforcement Agency (NDLEA) have intercepted more than 1.3 million pills and capsules of tramadol and other opioids as well as 6,000kg of cannabis worth over N3.4 billion in combined street value.

The successes were recorded in a series of operations across Lagos, Edo, Niger, Delta, Ondo, Gombe, Imo and the Federal Capital Territory.

Femi Babafemi, NDLEA’s Director, Media and Advocacy, who disclosed this in a statement issued on Sunday, said the agency also arrested a suspected fake police officer, a mechanic allegedly using his workshop as a drug storage facility and three young suspects found with two locally fabricated AK-47 rifles, a pistol and ammunition.

According to Babafemi, the operatives intercepted 1,200 parcels of Canadian Loud, a potent strain of cannabis weighing 603.75kg and valued at N1.811 billion.

The operation, he said also led to the arrest of 49-year-old Innocent Ekpe, who was allegedly transporting 292.48kg of skunk in a silver Toyota Sienna bus along the Benin-Onitsha Expressway in Asaba, Delta State, on Wednesday, September 16.

According to the NDLEA, Ekpe had allegedly impersonated a senior police officer to evade security checks while transporting illicit drugs across state lines.

The agency said, “Investigation established that Ekpe had long paraded himself as Godwin Emeka, a Deputy Superintendent of Police, using a forged ID card to escape scrutiny at checkpoints while transporting illicit consignments.”

A 39-year-old accomplice, Nduka Joseph, was also arrested during the operation.

In Edo State, NDLEA operatives acting on intelligence raided a location on Agbor Road, Benin City, where they arrested 45-year-old Matthew Ossai.

The agency said Ossai “used his auto-repair workshop as a front for storing illicit drugs.”

Officers recovered 48kg of Canadian Loud, 152g of methamphetamine and a metal box used to store the illicit substances.

At the Tin-Can Island Port in Lagos, a 40-foot container shipped from Montreal, Canada, which arrived on September 12, was placed under intensive monitoring following intelligence received by NDLEA operatives.

The shipment was subjected to a joint physical examination with Customs and other security agencies on Wednesday, September 16.

The agency said, “The search uncovered 1,200 parcels of Canadian Loud weighing 603.75 kilograms, concealed inside 31 black jumbo bags loaded within two Toyota Sienna vehicles in the container.”

In Niger State, NDLEA operatives on patrol along the Abuja-Kaduna Expressway at Chachi, Tafa Local Government Area, arrested Bashir Usman, 20; Abubakar Nuhu, 18; and Abdulrahman Abdulwahab, 18, on Tuesday, September 15.

The suspects were allegedly found with two locally fabricated AK-47 rifles and a magazine, a locally made pistol with a magazine and nine rounds of 9mm ammunition concealed in a black travel bag.

Also in Niger State, NDLEA officers on Friday, September 18, arrested Aminu Isyaku, 23, and Jamilu Habibu, 25, along the Abaji-Abuja highway.

More than 1.1 million assorted tramadol tablets and capsules, codeine syrup, methamphetamine and Exol tablets were recovered from the suspects.

The agency said the drugs were “concealed in eight sacks en route from Onitsha, Anambra state to Mararaba, Nasarawa state.”

In Lagos, NDLEA operatives arrested Onyeka Ofor at his residence in Aguda, Surulere, on Friday, September 18, with 48,900 pills of tramadol 225mg.

Seven cartons of cannabis sativa weighing 59kg were also intercepted at a logistics company, with a suspect, Luke Ugokwe, taken into custody.

In another operation in Lagos, 43-year-old Ibrahim Hudu was arrested at Apogbon on Thursday, September 17, with 998.38kg of nitrous oxide gas.

In Gombe State, 154,480 capsules of tramadol were recovered from Sabi’u Umar, 27, and Hassana Muhammad, 19, who were arrested separately at the Barunde area and Gombe main market on Friday, September 18.

In Imo State, 25-year-old Ifesinachi Godwin was arrested along the Owerri-Onitsha Road with 43.85kg of skunk on Friday.

Meanwhile, four suspects identified as Blessing Effiong, Saviour Peter, David Friday Sunday and Ability Peter Sunday were arrested during a raid on a two-hectare cannabis farm in Ita-Ogbolu forest, Ondo State.

The operation also led to the destruction of 5,000kg of skunk, while 48kg of dry and fresh cannabis was recovered for the prosecution of the suspects.

While commending the officers and personnel of the affected commands, NDLEA Chairman and Chief Executive Officer, Brig. Gen. Mohamed Buba Marwa (rtd), praised their professionalism and intelligence-driven approach to the operations.

Marwa urged them and their colleagues across the country to sustain the agency’s approach to drug control.

He said they should “continue with the current balanced approach to the drug control efforts of the Agency.”

News

Good morning! Nigerian Newspapers Headlines: NDC dissociates itself from 59-member presidential campaign council unveiled by Obi-Kwankwaso movement

Published

7 hours ago

September 20, 2026

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1. The leadership of the Nigeria Democratic Congress (NDC) has distanced itself from the 59-member presidential campaign council constituted by OK Movement, a support group for Peter Obi, presidential candidate of the party, and his running mate, Rabiu Musa Kwankwaso.

In a statement on Saturday, Cleopas Moses, NDC national chairman, said the list did not emanate from the party and should be disregarded.

2. Former Senior Special Assistant Media and Publicity to the late President Muhammadu Buhari, Mallam Garba Shehu, said yesterday that the litigation instituted against Nigeria by Sunrise Power and Transmission Company at the International Chamber of Commerce (ICC) tribunal in Paris was doomed from the outset.
Garba, who personally attended the January 15, 2025 sitting of the tribunal in the French capital, said it was clear from day one that Sunrise and its promoter Leno Adesanya “would lose this case following the failure of all the witnesses they invited, including, of course, a beautiful lady from Senegal allegedly providing comfort to one of their government contacts.

3. The Presidency yesterday knocked back economic proposals by the presidential candidate of the African Democratic Congress (ADC), Alhaji Atiku Abubakar. It asked him to take the proposals to Nigerians on his campaign trail rather than seeking to dictate how President Bola Tinubu should govern the country.

4. The Nigeria Hydrological Services Agency (NIHSA) has forecast a high risk of riverine flooding across 15 states between September 19 to 25.
In its national flood advisory issued on Friday, the agency said rising river levels could trigger flooding in communities located on floodplains during the seven-day period.
The affected states are Imo, Cross River, Ebonyi, Benue, Anambra, Akwa Ibom, Lagos, Rivers, Edo, Kogi, Taraba, Delta, Bayelsa, Enugu and Abia.

5. Delta State Police Command has arrested a suspect after its personnel intercepted a vehicle conveying military camouflage uniforms, boots and hats, as well as cartons of suspected Tramadol and other illicit drugs. The vehicle, a green Toyota Sienna with registration number KP 527 AAA, was intercepted by operatives of the command’s Anti-Cult Unit, Asaba, along the Onitsha-Ondo route on Friday.

6. Police in Rivers State have begun an investigation into the killing of a father of four, Kamadioye Krama, by gunmen in Emulation community, Abua/Odual Local Government Area. The spokesperson for the State Police Command, Blessing Agabe, confirmed the incident, stating that an investigation was ongoing to apprehend the culprits and bring them to book.

7. President Bola Tinubu has said that, from October 1, commuters across Nigeria must begin to see measurable reductions in transportation fares, as he has directed all 36 states to accelerate the National Affordable CNG Transit Programme. In a statement personally signed and released on Saturday, September 19, Tinubu said the push followed his August 27 meeting with state governors.

8. The Nigeria Security and Civil Defence Corps, NSCDC, has deployed Abdulhamid Kabara as the new commandant of its Niger State Command following the deaths of 37 suspected illegal miners in custody. Kabara replaces Suberu Aniviye, who was suspended as Niger NSCDC commandant after the 37 suspects died in Minna, the state capital, on Thursday.

9. The Northern Senators Forum on Saturday called for an immediate, transparent and independent investigation into the deaths of 37 young Nigerians in the custody of the Nigeria Security and Civil Defence Corps, NSCDC, in Minna, Niger State. It described the circumstances surrounding the occurrence as “deeply disturbing and unacceptable.”

10. The Minister of Interior, Olubunmi Tunji-Ojo, has suspended the Niger State Commandant of the Nigeria Security and Civil Defence Corps (NSCDC), Suberu Aniviye, and 20 other officers following the deaths of 37 suspected illegal miners in the Corps’ custody. The officers were suspended pending the outcome of an independent investigation into the deaths, which occurred on Thursday, September 17, 2026. The Ministry of Interior announced the development in a statement signed by Tunji-Ojo on Saturday

News

Keyamo, Sunday Dare knock Atiku for addressing President Tinubu as ‘Bola’

Published

20 hours ago

September 19, 2026

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The minister of aviation, Festus Keyamo, and the special adviser to President Bola Tinubu on media and public communication, Sunday Dare, have criticised former Vice-President Atiku Abubakar for referring to the President as “Bola”.

Keyamo described Atiku’s use of Tinubu’s first name as “disrespectful and discourteous”.

“The continuous reference to President Bola Ahmed Tinubu by His Excellency, ex Vice-President Atiku Abubakar in his press conference earlier today as ‘Bola’ is very disrespectful and discourteous,” he wrote on X.

He said Atiku should recognise that the office of the president deserves to be accorded dignity despite political differences.

“He should know better that no matter your differences with Mr. President, for the sake of the country, that office should be accorded all the dignity it deserves,” Keyamo said.

Keyamo also described the tone of Atiku’s remarks as reflecting “pain and bitterness”, while referring to the former vice-president’s recent comment about Tinubu’s age.

“After all, he made the outlandish claim the other day that Mr. President is older than himself. It is therefore a contradiction that he would also refer to an ‘elder’ by his first name,” he said.

Also, Dare, in a post on X on Saturday, reacted to Atiku’s call for Tinubu to reduce petrol and electricity costs.

Atiku had on Friday asked Tinubu to use the remaining eight months of his administration to reduce the burden of petrol and electricity costs on households, workers and businesses.

He said the removal of petrol subsidy in May 2023 had contributed to higher transportation, food, logistics and energy costs. He also warned against phasing out electricity subsidies without addressing the impact on households and businesses.

Dare described Atiku’s manner of addressing the president as “the height of insolence”, accusing the former vice-president of political desperation.

“Alhaji Atiku’s manner of addressing President Bola Tinubu as Bola is the height of insolence. It is a clear descent into the abyss of unbridled desperation and an unraveling mind,” Dare wrote.

“To seek to lecture a sitting president with the unbridled insolence of dropping his first name, petulantly barking instructions, and dictating how governance should be run within a truncated timeline is the height of political hubris.”

Dare defended the Tinubu administration’s economic policies, saying the president was undertaking reforms to address structural problems in the economy.

Dare also questioned Atiku’s criticism of government intervention in the economy.

“Atiku’s sudden conversion to the gospel of interventionism rings hollow,” he said.

He accused Atiku of using Nigerians’ economic difficulties for political purposes ahead of the 2027 elections.

“This is a desperate strategy by a perennial seeker of power who weaponizes transient national discomforts for electoral mileage,” Dare added.

“Nigerians do not need lectures on fiscal management from a political wanderer whose decades-long pursuit of the presidency has been defined by perpetual opportunism.”